And This Bird You Cannot Change

[iron_and_silver]

yawn.

i'm sleepy but i won't sleep.

i called one of my best friends. samantha. it felt good to talk to a friend..

well lemme rant.

I was thinking of moving in with my best friend of 10 years, christina. she is the type of person(her and her mom) that they are in essence, proud bullies. They are used to bully people to get what they want, or want them to do. i usually don't care.

but i had told them that i couldnt tell them a yes or no til i figured out my fianances, whichj would include my school

back note: her parents are buying a new house and leaving her their house. i would move into a smaller room paying $700 rent and basically be trading one mother for another. and their air condition never works..but they are buying a new house? hmm..

anyway they have changed their minds before and i was ok with it. and they called me up and instead of october as the move out date its now august.

"febe. answer me. yes or no?" - her mom
"i told you. lemme figure out my money."
"febe. so is that a yes or no?"
"i will tell u tommorrow when i sign up for classes."
"so..is that a yes or no.."
grrrr.

so she gives the phone back to christina and and me and her decide to go see a matinee. legally blonde - pretty funny

all she did was fucking pester me.

note about me: DON'T BACK ME INTO A FUCKING WALL AND EXPECT ME TO DO WOT U WANT. I WILL DO THE EXACT OPPOSITE OF YOUR GOAL!!!

i barely spoke to her the entire time.

plus she has the fucking gall to call up her mother on her cellphone and talk to her mother about a new roomate. wot the fuck? don't use reverse psychology on me. grrr

then finally for five minutes..she says..

".sigh. i don't understand you febe."
"yeah..goes with the territory of being a misunderstood artist."
".rolls her eyes. oh god."
".digs my hands in my pockets. heh."

i know this was our dream..but no. it dosent feel right. she says im lazy. but no. school comes first. im not her.
grrr. then 5 minutes after she drops me off she calls and leaves a message saying her mom found a new roomate. so don't worry about it..

and thats another thing. she kept saying she KNEW i was going to back out. grrrrrrrrrrrr. i hate when people try and predict me.

so basically that was last wednesday. i havent called her since then. i just dont want to talk to her for a while..

but as far as work..i get so frustrated. PICK UP YOUR SHIT PEOPLE. all day long i have to fucking straighten people's shit. you'd be surprised how fucking messy people are. i grind my teeth half the time.

but its almost 3:30am and i must go.